Anti-Marriage Amendment Advocates Anarchy

This November’s anti-gay-marriage amendment is only 14 words: “Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.” Its that word “only” that gives the amendment its teeth. Everyone already knows that marriage between a man and a woman is valid and recognized, as long as they follow the right procedure and neither one is already married. Taken literally it not only invalidates gay marriages (and domestic partnerships?) past present and future, it also invalidates everything (except marriage between a man and a woman).

Suppose after the amendment passes I want to question the validity of the Service Employee’s International Union. They would show up for bargaining some day, and I would advise my client to disregard them altogether. The SEIU is not valid or recognized in California. The SEIU is not a marriage between a man and a woman. Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California. Therefore, the SEIU is not valid or recognized in California. Don’t bother trying to form a new labor union. If it is not a marriage between a man and a woman, it will not be recognized or valid in California.

Driving home from the polls might be a problem after the anti-marriage amendment passes, if your driver’s license is invalid for not being a marriage between a man and a woman, and there may be no home to go to as the deed to your house was not a marriage between a man and a woman. Most people will not be too sad to hear that their debt to Providian is no longer valid or recognized, but some of the fun will come out of the news if the bank that has your money is no longer bound by the deposit agreement. You rush to the invalid court and complain to the unrecognized judge about your deposit agreement. The judge holds the deposit agreement up to the light, and takes out his reading glasses. “This does not look to me like a marriage between a man and a woman. It looks like a deposit agreement. Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.”

That would only happen if your judge is a strict constructionist.

About Ron St. John