Cornucopia 2013!

The theory of the six degrees of separation is a wonderful concept. The idea, for those who may be unfamiliar with it goes something like this: If you know someone……..within six steps….you might know everyone in the world. Who knows? We could all be related to Osama Bin Laden or Margaret Thatcher? It all sounds very unsubstantiated and impossible until you start looking around and understand that either Google Earth or some local drone could be watching you making coffee every morning in own kitchen. As Woody Allen said: “Some people call me paranoid…..other consider it perceptive!”

Orange Juice Blog, of course, condemns illegal trade in unicorn horns. (Photo from here: http://lifeboat.com/images/cornucopia.jpg.)

The issues of a six degree of separation world start to get a little out of hand when you consider the concept of “kinderd spirits”.  These are folks that you can simply relate to most times.  These are folks that can make you laugh, give you a warm cuddily feeling or completely satisfy your intellectual curosity.  This broad brush of life was hardly a reasonable concept until the creation of the Internet.  Before those days, we were all sequestered in our little villages around the world.  We knew the local pharmacist, the guy that delivered our morning paper, the owner of our local gas station, the waitress at our local restaurant where we got our bacon and eggs and could read our paper, smoke our cigarettes and make comments to those that sat around us about the horrible state of affairs we were stuck in.

Today, people complain bitterly that we are losing our American freedoms.  They site government intervention into everything we do.  They say that every click of our computers are being monitored, every phone call – being recorded, every step we make to the dry cleaners watched by some drone or black helocopter with infrared clarity – looking through our clothes and seeing things they shouldn’t.  We already know that every time we go through the airport the surveillance is amazing.  Whether someone is actually watching or not – it really doesn’t matter cause it is all on some digital disk or chip that uploads to that giant Computer Bank in Utah.  Our lives seem nothing more than a long video tape that catches important moments like us getting a double laite at Starbucks.

Well, what has happened to America’s pastimes?  Only the rich can afford to go to football, basketball or baseball games much anymore.  The cost of going to movies is outrageous.  The cost of traveling, including hotels and gasoline are skyrocketing  – and who has the time to even go on vacation when the monthly cost of living continues to rise?  OK, we have Cable.  Yes, some have Direct TV.  Yes some have Satillite Radio and TV.  OK, so we now have 350 various channels to choose from.  OK, so we can watch the Borgias, Thrones,  Bill Maher, Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel, Charley Rose late night and on CBS in the morning, MSNBC, Fox News, CNN,  C-Span, FX, Nancy Grace, The View – occasionally, COZI and the Lone Ranger and Tales of Wells Fargo with Dale Robertson, ENWS and Gunsmoke, Sports Center with Chris Berman, The NBA with Charles Barkley and Shack, the Laker Channel, the USC Channel, The Kings Channel, the NFL Channel (After five years without it on Time Warner), NBC Sports – occasionally, CNBC – occasionally and lots of movies.  PBS has a variety of great programming but who can spend their entire life agonizing over past historical imperfections; Bill Moyers is good – off and on.  OK – so we have a few choices….but then what about You Tube?  Still get stuck pulling up the Animals: “Please don’t let me be misunderstood!” of the Grateful Dead – “Casey Jones”.  Or Waylon and Willie doing “If I had a clean shirt – I might!”  Or George Strait – “Amarillo by Morning”.  Or even “if God didn’t make little green apples” by OC Smith!  Can anyone believe they moved Ed Schultz to two shows on week-ends on MSNBC – Bogus!

So much to do in life, so little time.  Well, today we have issues right here in the good old US of A.  We have Syria, North Korea, Palestine, Israel, Africa, the European Union crisis, the Banking crisis, the Healthcare Crisis, the GMO Crisis, the Pharaceutical Crisis, the Energy Crisis and don’t forget we have the Benghazi Scandal,  the IRS Scandal, The AP Scandal, the Fast and Furious Scandal and we have a wonderful Congress that runs on getting nothing accomplished.  Maybe they are watching too much You Tube or watching too many people taking their morning showers in their own homes which are being watched by government authorities?  Who knows?  It’s all a bit much – ya think?  Have your ever seen the like of the mean spirited, abusive, crude use of language in our government committees when they are ready to use tools of the Inquisition when questioning government employees?  They seldom do that to the those folks in private industry – at least not to the degree you see attacking our President, his cabinet members and even the small fish that just have government jobs way down the food chain.  Who are these folks trying to impress? –  their moms perhaps, all sitting at home saying:  “That’s my boy!”  Sometimes, you have to feel like that awful British Cavalryman in “The Patriot”…..”Stupid, little boy!”

Meanwhile, back in America – The LA Kings face the Chicago Blackhawks in the Western National Hockey League Final.  That, as in the Eastern Final, the Boston Bruins take on the Pittsburgh Penquins….Saturday.  The finals of the National Basketball Association are not quite set yet.  The Miami Heat who should be facing the San Antonio Spurs in the final is having a tough time with a 2-2 record against the Indiana Pacers.  The Dodgers are struggling and their nice Manger Don Mattingly – (Who Joe Torre blessed!) is a bit under fire – but we think he should stay.  Meanwhile, the LA(Anaheim)  Angels are struggling with their two super stars fighting “the Curse of the Cowboy – (Gene Autry)….and both being paid huge money are nowhere near any personal peak or even having a good season.

Now, what about those Lakers?  OK, Kobe – Yes Kobe, you can come back next year, but you really don’t have to dude.  You have proven everything a giant superstar could ever possibly prove.  Go out like Ted Williams – at the top of your game!  Like Michael Jordan!  Go play baseball for the Pittsburgh Pirates…theyneed you dude!  Go play golf with President Obama and Tiger…just don’t go out with Tiger afterwards.  Become that NBA Pundit that chats it up with Shack and Charles Barkley.  No, we do not like D’Antoni – he should go!  No, we do not like Steve Nash – he should go!  No, we do not like Dwight Howard – he should go!  No, we do not like Steve Blake – he should go!  No, we are tired of Meta World Peace…..he needs to go – to talk radio!  Pau Gasol, is a wonderful human being but needs to join his brother at the Grizzlies.  No, Kobe – you have run out of time.  Last year, had Stan Van Gundy be brought on initially and not Mike Brown…..things could have gone better.  Too late now.  Your team has fallen apart.  As configured, you have a great 2nd tier team.  That is not the Laker dynasty that Dr. Jerry, Phil,  Jerry West or you  have in mind.   Next year will be a totally reconstructive year.  A ground up, start to finish rebuilding year.  You really need to bring Kurt Rambus back, Brian Shaw, Phil Jackson and one independent “Great Thinker” – you Kobe!

OK, what about USC Football?  Nightmare on Elm Street comes to mind.  Pat Haden may wind up losing his job if he doesn’t fire Lane Kiffin this season.  The USC Alumni are not the same ones that lived through the years after John McKay and John Robinson.  They have all seen ghost of Larry Smith coming back and it is a very scary look at the future.  You can make all the excuses in the Western World about NCAA Sanctions – they all do not wash.  Haden, you can’t find one kid in all of America that can kick extra points and field goals?  What you can’t afford to give ONE of your precious scholarships up – for a kicker?  You are a mindless twit if you can’t find a set of great kickers this year.  We want long punts – We want Long Kick-Offs – We want Long Field Goals – We want Short Field Goals – We want Long Extra Points and we want Short Extra Points.  We also want a kicker that can put those punts out on the sidelines at the one yard line!

Haden……get your act together.  Call Jack Del Rio again!  Tell him that he can bring a complete set of NFL Coaches with him.  Tell him you need to beat some guy at Stanford.  Some guy at Oregon.  Some guy at Washington.  Some guy at Arizona and Arizona State.  Some guy eventually at CAL and most of all….he needs to beat Jim Mora at UCLA to keep his job.  Haden, Ohio State got Urban Meyer and we get Kiffin……our nose is an old friend and something smells stinky in Denmark!  The USC store at South Coast Plaza is empty dude.  Plenty of USC memorabilia and nobody buying – get it?  And one final thought – you either get a top quality Nationally recognized boutique QB –  running the offense or you can quit.

Angels and Dodgers – stay the course……we love ya…..you guys will eventually pull out the victories necessary to make the play-offs.  Boys of Summer!

Meanwhile, we can all concentrate on the those really important things that the various News Channels and agencies tell us to worry about;  Drones, Benghazi, Unemployment,  Tea Party Tax Reporting and Eric Holder!

Cornucopia 2013 – Six Degrees of Separation …..to be sure!  Ya think this really the Matrix and we are living in a virtual world and our perceptions are all being controlled by a giant computer…so to be started up in Utah?  Nah, that would probably be – just a wild guess!