Woodcut discovered by archaeologist Greg Diamond.
July 23, 2221.
Every summer this distinguished blog gets the same inquiry, “What’s the story behind those Q-Posadas that get sung all over Orange and Riverside Counties about a month after the Federal Juneteenth Holiday?” This year, we had our trusty staff look through our archives, and we believe we have an answer for you – it’s a good story too!
Believe it or not, early in the 21st century a clown named Donald Trump, known popularly as “The Rotten Yam” and considered by historians to be the Worst President in American History, managed to mislead the nation for four miserable and crazy years. Not accepting his re-election defeat in 2020, he sent various emissaries around the nation, to preach the gospel of his “Big Lie” that that election was stolen from him, along with sundry other conspiracy theories (most associated with a movement called “Q-Anon”) that sound outlandish to the modern ear.
Gaetz and Greene on House floor.
Two of these Trump emissaries were Congressmembers Matt Gaetz of Florida and Marjorie Taylor Greene of Georgia. In July of 2021, probably still believing in the region’s old reputation for right-wing extremism, they expected to find a warm welcome in Orange and Riverside Counties, but were dismayed to be scheduled, and then CANCELLED, first by Laguna Hills, then by Riverside, then by Anaheim. Between demographic changes and the wonders of education, the area was no longer tolerant of such malevolent nuttiness. Finally the two took refuge on the sands of Huntington Beach, only to be publicly ridiculed by a prankster in a stars-and-stripes wet suit.
All these events were memorialized as a variation of an even older Mexican ritual-and-song known as Las Posadas, traditionally sung before Christmas time to tell of the unsuccessful search for shelter undertaken by the parents of Jesus Christ, Mary and Joseph. La Habra-based Guatemalan-American anthropologist Arlyn Buck tells the story, as she heard it from her great-great-grandparents, in her heartwarming book “The Q-Posadas: Orange County Celebrates its Newfound Political Sanity.”
The first verse is sung by a child playing Congressman Matt Gaetz (then under indictment for sundry corruption and sex crimes), and addressed to the city of Laguna Hills, where he and Greene were first scheduled to hold their rally:
A group of children responds, playing the good folk of Laguna Hills, none too impressed with the Congressman:
At this point, an offended Marjorie Taylor Greene pipes up, usually played by a young girl with a certain amount of vocal chops. (Note how the melody this time becomes more melismatic, in keeping with the Congresswoman’s histrionic nature.)
Riverside however proves no more co-operative than Laguna Hills, as the children playing those Inland Empire folks make abundantly clear:
Rejected by Laguna Hills and Riverside, our sad pair sets its eyes on the City of Kindness, Anaheim. Despite that town’s endemic corruption, however, it’s been a long time since it was a haven for racist hate. It’s true that the KKK, which briefly ruled there in the 1920’s, returned in 2016 hoping for a resurgence, but they roundly got their asses kicked. Still, Gaetz and Greene set their forlorn hopes on Anaheim, as expressed by a duet playing the hapless pair:
Irritated at the mischaracterization of the KKK incident, the children of Anaheim give Gaetz and Greene a swift kick in the rear:
By this point, according to Dr. Buck, it was too late for the Congresscritters to have a proper “Make America First” rally ANYWHERE in the OC. But, remembering certain news reports from the town of Huntington Beach – how it had long been a haven for white supremacists, how it’d been a gathering spot in 2020 for anti-mask and anti-vax nutjobs, and how Tito Ortiz had been elected onto council overwhelmingly before crashing and burning, they thought they’d salvage their long trip to Southern California with a joyful celebration on the sand.
Alas for them, they were suffering under a misconception of Surf City too, which had just a few months before chased a bunch of white supremacists out of town when they tried to have a “White Lives Matter” rally there. Welcomed onto the sand by an apparently friendly character in a stars and stripes wetsuit, Matt and Marjorie found themselves once again being punked, on camera:
And just then the good people of Surf City, and everyone else, conclude the Q-Posadas festively, in Beach Boys harmony, with the upbeat finale:
SEE The Daily Beast, “The Gaetz-Greene Fundraising Tour is Actually a CASH FIRE.“
Worst President in American history? That’s hilarious. He’s the worst human being in American history.
When do we get to hear this performed? Before 2221, I hope!
Already seems old. I’m working on “We Fought John Saunders, and We Won!” which is gonna be sung by a huge crowd of Rancho La Paz people August 2.