What Skills does Steve Lodge have that will be useful to Lucille Kring?

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You gotta hand it to Councilwoman Lucille Kring on one front – she sure is good at giving Anaheim the finger.

Having won re-election, but nearly failing to get the endorsement of her Party and now confined to an impotent council minority, having had all her board and commission seats stripped from her in highly deserved retribution, she now sits squirming miserably on the dais, blithely ridiculed by colleagues and public alike for her hilarious malapropisms, foggy logic, and eyebrow-raising lies.

But her revenge is at hand, with the opportunity to hire a new aide – and who better than Steven Albert Chavez Lodge, twice-rejected residence-faking Council candidate and brutal perjuring ex-cop.  (Thankfully the Weekly has already used the obvious but apt cliché “a match made in hell,” so I no longer feel compelled to use it myself.)

Steve doesn’t seem like council aide material though, so the question in my title suggests itself – what special skills does he possess that could prove useful to Lucille as she trudges through her sullen fourth Council term?  Let us ponder…

Extreme and unexpected violence – that’s the first thing we associate with Steve, between his record on the Santa Ana police force and his sucker-punching (documented on this blog) of a romantic rival.  Could it be that Lucille sees this as a positive virtue?  We fondly remember her joking about the police shooting of a suspect that “it saved us the cost of a trial.”  Perhaps she imagines having an unpredictably violent aide will cut down on the non-cooperation and ridicule she gets from Council and public alike.  Likewise, the hiring of this rogue cop will help re-assure Anaheim’s police union how unseriously Lucille takes police reform.

A willingness to lie rivaling Lucille herself.  Both politicians’ ease with prevarication is fabled.  Ask the anti-STR crowd about Lucille’s honesty, or the OC GOP itself, to whom Lucille excused her many broken campaign promises with, “Well, it wasn’t written in my literature!”  Lodge notoriously perjured himself over his police brutality cases, and regularly changes his story over where he lives, as required by his political masters.  I’m not saying Lucille needs Steve’s help in coming up with more lies, but it must seem preferable NOT to have an aide who will tell you, “Ma’am, you can’t say that … it’s not true and everybody knows it.”

A certain low-rent reality-show glamor that Lucille likely finds appealing.  It’s likely that the vain Councilwoman, who routinely uses a photograph of herself that must be thirty years old (left), finds the lifestyle of Lodge, with his Real Housewives of OC consort and Facebook wall covered with Mexican cruises and other conspicuous consumption, to be irresistibly glamorous (even if most of us see it as ridiculously vulgar) and hopes some of it will rub off on her.  

An allegiance to the kleptocracy that keeps both their bread buttered.  Both Kring and Lodge ran for council last year backed with millions of Disney, SOAR and Pringle money. Since his falling out with Mayor Tait in the run-up to the 2012 election, Lodge has been a loyal advocate for everything that insatiable crowd wants, winning a nice percentage as a Hill International “consultant” to lobby for such taxpayer-soaking projects as the Disney Streetcar and the 405 Toll Lanes.  Lucille’s fealty to this crowd dates nearly as far, to when they helped her retire HER 2012 campaign debts, and required her breaking nearly all her campaign promises.

A shared loathing of the homeless, “illegals,” and Mayor Tait. Just look at Lucille’s record of public statements, and examine, as the Weekly did, Steve Chavez Lodge’s Facebook wall.

I’m sorry, that’s all I can come up with.  But it looks like we’re going to be seeing this guy around a lot more, as his commutes to Anaheim increase.  God help us.

 

About Vern Nelson

Greatest pianist/composer in Orange County, and official political troubadour of Anaheim and most other OC towns. Regularly makes solo performances, sometimes with his savage-jazz band The Vern Nelson Problem. Reach at vernpnelson@gmail.com, or 714-235-VERN.